Name

Heaven knows I’m riddled with enough eccentricities, I should take medication from a PEZ dispenser and warrant a tailor made straitjacket. But, I’m just saying, name your precious child something that won’t invite rocks being hurled at them on the playground.

Granted, Lisa, is as dishwater as a name can get. So I have NO business pointing a finger and mocking someone’s name. What can I say? It was the 60’s, my African-American parents were desperately trying to assimilate, and the daytime soap opera “The Edge of Night” was mainstream.

Since I’m not a parent, I can’ t speak from experience, but I would guess serious thought is given to what you’d name your child. As said name will FOREVER be attached to your precious child. I realize, parents want their child to stand out from the rest and be original, but shouldn’t 98.5% of that be reflected in their personality not their name?

On board, I’ve come across a few humdingers. If given the opportunity I think the parents ought to be slapped twice. If you come from a different country, I expect your name to be a tongue twister and will do my very best to pronounce it correctly and not give you some silly ass nickname. But born and raised in the USA, uh, well . . .

Three dudes on board have begged us just to call them Q. As their first names are so unpronounceable and are too long to fit onto the name badges we have to wear. Shaquetta, Kwanza, Komika, Chajawana, and Sunshine . . . my eyes have rolled into the back of my skull.

Then we the alias. Their first names bore them so they go by their middle names

Thomas now Grant

Robert now Tyler

Richard now Dylan

Can you blame them?

Okay, I have to let this topic go. As I feel petty for bringing it up, but I couldn’t keep silent either. Where'd I put that PEZ dispenser?